Who I want to be in 5 years

This morning Windfyre and I were sitting on the couch with coffee, clicking through foxtel, looking for something to watch before I got ready for work. He noticed that by sitting through the end of Beyblade we could watch the beginning of a Transformers show. Once we had flicked it on Windfyre became privy to what I had known for some time: Beyblade is really bad.


I love it though.


I saw Beyblade on Cheez TV a few times when I was about 15 years old. I enjoy bright colours but this show was TERRIBLE! I watched in disgust as the random cat-eyed Chinese kids feuded over a bit of plastic, recoiled at the sight of the art and clamped pillows over my head every time Tyson spoke.


I sat through it though. God only knows why, I can only tell you what got me hooked, not what got me watching. Let’s presume it was my unwillingness to get up and change the channel post-Digimon that kept me going long enough to start looking for the DVDs.


The character design was tragic is can be but there was a girl named Mariah in white “Chinese” clothes, with pink hair and a bow that looked vaguely like cat’s ears. I am a sucker for pink, cats and girls. I also enjoy the odd Chinese collar, as most of the angry alpha nerds do.


What draws me into spectacularly crap shows like Beyblade is the compulsion to redesign the characters and their costumes. Once upon a time, before I found the entrance to the magical land of Real Estate at the back of my closet, I wanted to be a costume designer.


Any show can grab my attention if I see a poorly executed idea in the designs. I swoop in and concoct my own poorly executed version. Then I hoard them all in my art books, mulling over them, musing to myself how talented I am and utilising alleged talents to accomplish nothing.


Maybe that’s the way I like it. Maybe I feel if I actually publish something it may not turn out well. Maybe I’d become super fantastically famous and hate it. Maybe nobody would ever buy or comment on it.


All that makes for a great excuse to not bother finishing my drawings. Because I can work a pencil but I will have to learn a whole new set of skills to finish anything beyond sketching. I don’t like practicing new skills, I’m used to enjoying what I am immediately good at and avoiding things I struggle with.


What I hope to have learned by the time I am 30 is how to grit my teeth and slog through things I don’t want to do. I will make my life so very much better when I do 🙂

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